Separation Anxiety?

 

I worked all week to make it to the weekend only to suffer a case of separation anxiety.  Normally this is reserved for toddlers who love their parents so much they just can't let go of their necks.  *insert snicker here*  Although this weekend it hit Lady S's father and me.  This is the first weekend in her 2 years of life that she has spent more than a few hours away from us.  And quite frankly I have no idea what to do with myself.  I have not broken out into tears, screaming fits, or full on temper tantrums but as I type this I am close!  

Since Lady S was born I struggled with allowing her to stay with someone other than us.  As a matter of fact, when we found out she had a peanut allergy, we were put on high alert.  But this translates into control.  Control over Lady S and fear quite frankly.  It is quite impossible for us to turn off parent brain.  For the last 2 years our lives have been all about Lady S so the prospect of her not being here baffles me.  I should preface by saying that Lady S is with my mother, her Gigi as she calls her.  And believe me she is in good hands.  After all Gigi raised me to perfection.  *insert snort here* 

So I packed her suitcase with all the necessary components, briefed Gigi on what to look for in case of an allergic reaction, and proceeded to drop her off.  I waited around for 3 hours before finally leaving.  It felt good to roll the windows down and blast the music in the car.  Things I did before I became a mom.  To sleep in without worrying about if Lady S has met the maximum absorbency of those Huggies nighttime diapers.  To be able to kiss my husband without a toddler in between us.  But it has also been weird.  I did not have to make sippy cups of milk or juice or bring baggies of Goldfish or Pirate's Booty.  We were able to enjoy brunch without having to escort a crying, flailing toddler out because her attention span had maxed out.  

This small glimpse of the life we had pre-kid has been nice.  But the only cure for separation anxiety is to be reunited with the person you miss. 

One thing for sure is that when I see Lady S's face tomorrow I'll be grateful for my small slice of life sans the kiddo.  But more importantly I'll be happy to see her face again! 

Until next time, 

Mom to Lady S 

Days Go By...

Now the birth story is officially inked, the real fun begins.  The last two years have been the most amazing time of my life.  To go from being a newborn to infant to full on toddler has been quite the journey for Lady S and us.  The first two months are a blur of breastfeeding, diaper changes, inspecting baby poop, and cooing in Lady S's face for endless hours.  Ah....but lets not forget the sleepless nights.  For any of you that are thinking about getting pregnant or are pregnant right now, you will have many sleepless nights.  MANY.....You will walk around like a zombie.  You won't remember what day of the week it is even if you have gone back to work.  You will be amazed at how much you can function on as little as 4 hours of sleep. Yes folks that is real life when it comes to parenting an infant.

But it does get much better.  Once that beautiful babe starts sleeping through the night, which Lady S did at 9 months, you won't know what to do with yourself.  It will be like God himself came down and blessed you with his holy grace.  But you won't know what to do with all that free time.  Maybe wash and fold mounds of baby clothes.  Perhaps dust your house that has dust bunnies doing the cha cha slide all over it.  Or perhaps find the strength to see if your mojo still works.  In any case, it's a joyous occasion.

After the kiddo becomes mobile, the fun starts!  Your house will never be the same.  But this is when your child's personality really begins to shine.  I will say that 10 months until now has been the best time of our lives.  The language development is astounding.  Lady S picks up on words that I have never imagined she knew.  Note though this is a double edged sword.  Those four letter words that kids shouldn't say probably should be guarded for when they go down to bed.  That way you have all that precious time while they are sleeping though the night to be as crass as you like!

The downside to all this wonderful growth is that the kids grow so fast.  In a blink of an eye you have a talking, demanding, loving, opinionated toddler who is quite good at telling you were to get on and get off.

In the end the days go by.....they go by too fast...but the ride is so much fun!

Mom to Lady S

Blame it on the kid....

Jesus! I have not posted to this blog in over 2 years.  Bad Bad Blogger I am.....Amazingly I am still here and still trucking right along.  Of course by now you can do the math and realize that I've given birth.  Actually I gave birth 25 months ago!  I have a live, goldfish eating, demanding toddler whose favorite words seem to be "mine", "daddy", and "have it".  Go figure that.  So where do I start to bring this blog up to speed and current.....Let's go all the way back to her birth which I remember like it was yesterday.... 


June 27th, 2010  THE DUE DATE!!!! 


I started the morning out feeling overall tired.  Completely rundown and ready to get the whole pregnancy thing over and get to parenting.  That morning I spent the entire day on the couch because at that point my lady parts felt like they were being constantly assaulted by a little baby head.  Pair that with my ribs being constantly jabbed and jumped on and I was over it!  The entire day was pretty relaxed.  The hubby and I spent time together since we knew that was soon coming to an end.  In retrospect my back hurt all day long. A throbbing pain that would come and go over and over but I chalked it up to typical 40 week pregnancy aches and pains.  That night was the BET Awards and the 3rd episode of the season of True Blood.  I remember telling the baby that if she wanted to come that night, let it be after I had my fill of Eric Northman and all his vampirey sexiness.  So we settled in with a spicy Qdoba dinner of chicken nachos and watched Prince and Eric.  That's when my back really started to hurt but again I thought it was nothing.  On a whim I did my hair at 10 p.m just in case something happened.  Finally hit the bed at midnight and after a last ditch attempt to get things going fell asleep.  BUT I could not get comfortable to save my life.  As all pregnant mamas know sleeping is a thing of the past long before you bring a screaming newborn home.  So I woke up at 2 a.m. and had to use the bathroom.  But it never stopped flowing...I thought "Dear God this is it....I think".  I woke up the hubby and said I thought my water had broken but the bed wasn't wet so I was going back to sleep. HAHAHA!!!  Never happened....I could not get comfortable and eventually the water kept coming.  So I made the necessary calls to my OB and my mom.  After a quick bite to eat and a shower off to the hospital we went.  


We made it around 4:15 a.m and after being poked and prodded in my neither regions it was confirmed my water was broken and I wasn't leaving the hospital without our daughter.  The darn nurse poked me twice and could not get an IV started.  I guess because she kept talking which I appreciated but I wore those bruised arms for 2 weeks after giving birth.  The second nurse got it on the first try and we were checked in. The next 8 hours were a haze of walking, breathing, positioning, and prayer.  Man I wanted it to be done but apparently I wasn't in a good contraction pattern.  This is where it gets hairy.  I'll spare the details but I consented to being given Pitocin at about noon.  All I will say about those contractions is imagine being stabbed over and over in your uterus and then someone pouring rubbing alcohol on the wound....repeatedly....and then imagine that pain for 2 minutes straight....it disappears for 30 seconds and then comes right back.  That is honestly the best way I can describe it.  After an hour of that rollercoaster I had an epidural placed and just waited....literally....I will say the doctor and the nurses were phenomenal.  They were very encouraging except towards then end when I had only dilated 6 centimeters after 15 hours of labor and the C-Section word popped out.  


About this time I sent the hubby home to shower since it was going to be a long night and that was the BIGGEST mistake ever.  Thankfully my mom was there with me but needless to say I will NEVER send him on a errand again while I am in labor.  The doctor came in and checked me at 9:30ish and it was time.  I was 10 centimeters dilated and the baby was descending on her own.  Funny thing I had no idea...my epidural numbed every nerve I had from the waist down...it was all dead weight.  After giving 3 practices pushes, my mom frantically calling my husband, him going 80 mph down the road to get back, and security denying him access to get to me, the doctor announced we couldn't wait or she would make her way out on her own.  So they broke the bed down and in 3 pushes this beautiful baby came into the world with eyes wide open.  I was in shock and happy and amazed!!! This was my baby and all I could do was smile at her.  My first words to her were "Hi there beautiful!  Mommy loves you!"  My mom cut the cord and there she was....My own little human being...my daughter...my love....my life.  All I could do was smile.  The doctor did his thing and my hubby came in less than 5 minutes after she was born.  I directed him straight to her....the after birth fiasco is something he didn't want or need to see!!!!!  


Thinking back on it there were a few things I will do differently with our next child.  

• Labor at home longer - The waiting at the hospital was killer...and boring... I honestly feel like that was one reason I didn't progress.  I need the freedom to move around, grunt, squat, otherwise progress birth on my own. 
• Refuse Pitocen at all costs - I am not against this drug but the contractions it induces and what ensues afterwards is not what I wanted. 
• The husband will go nowhere for obvious reasons. 
• Epidural?  Yes Please!!!!  I know there is this big argument for or against epidurals but that is a personal decision for each woman.  For myself, I'll have one with a Popsicle on the side.  Thanks!

So there it is.....Post from here on out will be about our adventures into toddlerhood! 

Signed 

Mom to Lady S 

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